It was six months ago we gathered to launch the year with the Overarching Question, “Must a hero conquer fear to find true love?”

As the sun beat down and the cupcake truck waited, we scribbled down our answers to this statement:

If I give up my fear of ____________, I will unleash a love of ________________.

Later, the Eagles stuffed the pieces of paper into a shiny blue time capsule, dug a hole and buried it. The act of burying our fears was not to forget them, but to keep them from hindering us on our renewed learning journey.

Before the burial ceremony, I jotted down the fears/loves so that mid-year we could reflect upon our own learning paths. That time has come.

Do you recognize your fear on the list? Could you recognize your child’s?

Here it is:

If I give up my fear of my kids not being successful, I will unleash a love of parenting.

If I give up my fear of not being good enough, I will unleash my full potential.

 If I give up my fear of losing, I will unleash a love of play.

 If I give up my fear of failure, I will unleash a love of learning from mistakes.

 If I give up my fear of rejection, I will unleash a love of life.

 If I give up my fear of unintended consequences, I will unleash a love of the journey.

 If I give up my fear of loneliness, I will unleash a love of meeting new people.

 If I give up my fear of letting go, I will unleash a love of freedom.

 If I give up my fear of commitment, I will unleash a love of accomplishment.

 If I give up my fear of getting behind, I will unleash a love of learning.

 If I give up my fear of speaking out loud, I will unleash a love of my ideas.

 If I give up my fear of losing things I love, I will unleash a love of now.

 If I give up my fear of badge work, I will unleash a love of celebrating.

If I give up my fear of working hard, I will unleash a love of finishing my work.

 If I give up my fear of inadequacy, I will unleash a love of creative freedom.

 If I give up my fear of self-consciousness, I will unleash a love of dancing.

 If I give up my fear of my children behaving badly, I’ll unleash a love of seeing them find their own path.

If I give up my fear of my children being impolite, I’ll unleash a love of going places with them.

If I give up failure as a parent, I will unleash a love of my journey.

If I give up my fear of vulnerability, I’ll unleash a love of self.

If I give up my fear of competition, I’ll unleash a love of myself.

If I give up my fear of wasting time, I’ll unleash a love of spontaneous activities.

If I give up my fear of speaking up, I’ll unleash a love of being heard.

If I give up my fear of large groups, I’ll unleash a love of team projects.

If I give up my fear of heights, I’ll unleash a love of climbing with my kids.

If I give up my fear of being denied, I’ll unleash a love of love.

If I give up my fear of failure at something important, I’ll unleash a love of being bold.

If I give up my fear of marketing, I’ll unleash a love of writing.

If I give up my fear of letting people down, I’ll unleash a love of pushing myself far.

If I give up my fear of getting lost, I’ll unleash a love of adventure.

If I give up my fear of sleeping alone, I’ll unleash a love of independence.

If I give up my fear of bugs, I’ll unleash a love of all living things.

If I give up my fear of bears, I’ll unleash a love of sleeping outside.

If I give up my fear of wasps, I’ll unleash a love of  wide-open spaces.

If I give up my fear of making mistakes on Khan, I’ll unleash a love of math.

If I give up my fear of doubt, I’ll unleash a love of unlimited abundance.

If I give up my fear of heights, I’ll unleash a love of happiness.

Our list is poignant. Stirring, even. Two thoughts rise up immediately.

1) Most of these are from the children. How rare it is for 6-15 year-olds to be able to name their fears and pinpoint what those fears steal from them.

2) We are all in the same boat. We are afraid. This is not all bad. It’s a key to survival. Yet some of our fears keep us imprisoned, unable to be who we were born to be.

The ultimate question is whether or not we can conquer those imprisoning fears. If so, would this unleash new love?

I don’t have my answers yet but reflecting on this list has helped me as a parent. It has reminded me that when my sons struggle or avoid or procrastinate or deny or lash out, maybe my best questions are, “What are you afraid of?” “What would happen if you could conquer that fear?” “Tell me more about your story.”

I’ve got less than six months to figure this out. By then, we’ll have come up with the next Overarching Question which may open up vistas requiring less fear and more love. We shall see.